Don't Fuck with My Coffee

I've been holed up sick (thanks for the "A Simple Cold Turns into The Plague at the Drop of Hat" gene Dad) so I've seen alot of TV and daytime TV at that. Saw alot of ads for flavored coffee non-dairy creamer. Ugh. If I want Blueberry Pie flavored coffee I will have a slice of blueberry pie with my coffee. Don't fuck with the beautiful flavor that is coffee. I can understand a bit of cinnamon or vanilla or things that can enhance coffee but don't add a bunch of chemicals to it and try to convince me its something else.
Hmmmm.......Is this some dieting ploy? I'm not going to want the chocolate fudge brownies if my coffee tastes like that? Never mind that the texture and temperature is way off. It reminds me of all the freaking yogurts that taste like anything besides yogurt. Fuck that, when I brave the effects of having dairy its usually for some good Greek yogurt and not some Creme Brulee Yoplait pink ribbon crap.

I'm going to make another toddy. In fact, I will share the recipe. Dad may have given me Prone to Upper Respitory Infections DNA but he made up for it by taking me to get antibiotics and making me a toddy :)

hot tea (herbal works if you want to be healthy about it)
lemon
honey
a shot of whiskey or scotch (as Dad said, "amber alcohol is your friend")

Mix, sip and feel a hell of a lot better.

Meet your authors at Renegade Craft Fair this weekend!

The RENEGADE CRAFT FAIR is happening this weekend on Division St, between Damen and Hermitage. It is totally free and totally AWESOME. Last year was a blast and this year cool bands like Califone and Hey Willpower will be playing in the evening.

I will be running David Murray's awesome SEIBEI teeshirt booth all weekend long with the lovely Vally Val, and David himself will be in town Sunday! If you do not know Seibei, it's the teeshirt line behind the fabulous SANDWICH DINOSAUR shirts seen all over Chicago! He's got lots of new designs and some sweet assed dinosaur necklaces, so be sure to check that shit out! (and give me a hug and bring me some coffee, probably).

SEE YOU THERE!

You're an asshole and you don't even realize it.

A while back I blogged about the cloying and obnoxious customer service policies of a certain restaurant I had privy to reading the employee manual for.

I just received a comment from a woman calling me classist for implying that the need to feel "loved" (if corporate douchebaggery can truly be called "love"- I know all about that one from working in the service industry) by a the man or woman who takes your dirty dishes away reflects a serious emotional insecurity.

Wow. Just wow.

Honey, that busser doesn't love you, he's just trying to get into your pants!

And honestly, I didn't see the service when I ate there. It took them ten minutes to bring us water, and our waitress spent the better part of the evening trying to work me for journalism contacts. If that's love, I'd rather be hated.

Eating well is the best revenge

Last time I was at Mitsuwa, I stocked up on Kewpie Mayonnaise and Okonomiyaki Sauce to cook Okonomiyaki for my now ex-boyfriend. Then he dumped my ass. So I made Okonomiyaki for myself! I think it's officially a three-way tie between Kewpie Mayo, Okonomiyaki Sauce and Anger for the best Okonomiyaki topping.

Pet Peeve of the day

People who can't tell the difference between a weak pour and a drink that's mixed so well that you can't taste the booze. Not being able to taste the alcohol is a good thing!

Unrelatedly I had a (smart) bartender tell me last night that I shouldn't freeze vodka because it "shocks" the spirit and you have to shake it or something. Though really I was kinda toasted when that conversation went down.

What Do I Hate?

Vegan cookbooks.

I mean, is it so hard to write a book *without* trying to create more True Believers?

I'm not reading a cookbook for gospel, I'm reading cookbook for recipes and food information. I don't care how cool or enlightened or exceptional you think your life style is, I just want something interesting to do with beans.

So vegans, guess what? Your cookbooks universally suck. Go read Nigella Lawson, or M.F.K. Fisher, or Anthony Bourdain, or Julia Child, or Thomas Keller, or Michael Ruhlman or Jane Grigson, or Laurie Colwin, or Stefan Gates, or, or, or any number of food writers who really care about food and the way people eat. Learn something. Then come tell me about how cool you are.

Thank you very much

P.S. I'm drunk, don't mind me.

Impatient assed counter people take note:

You wanna know what pisses me off? When I'm at a bakery or a cafe or something, checking out the drink list or the bakery case, and nobody's standing in line, and the counter person gets all impatient and demands my order within seconds then stands there looking irate until I make up my mind. I am the type of gal whose day is ruined if she orders the wrong thing due to pressure, and I actually prefer if there's a line because I can leisurely make up my mind. Seriously- give me five minutes, you can go back to texting your friends while I decide what I want, mmmkay?